21 July 2012

There is nothing you can name...


Do you ever want to get arrested, just so you can get a rest? I ask for two reasons:
  1. I enjoy wordplay.
  2. I'm so tired! I can't seem to get the cobwebs outta my head lately, and sometimes the idea of being forced to get a full night's sleep every day sounds fantastically appealing.
Unfortunately I care far too much about my voting rights to engage such a notion. My foremothers did not risk their livelihoods and social status so I could throw it all away for a nap.

Fun fact: anytime someone mentions Women's Suffrage, I picture Mrs. Banks from Mary Poppins

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This picture does not belong to me.
I am borrowing it as a visual aid.
I found it here.







"Our gallant ladies in prison are waiting for me to lead them in song!"










Which, now that I think about it, is going to make a great segue into our next topic. Because even though that's all I set out to say, I'm not yet bored with my thoughts...

Dame Julie Andrews Is My Hero!

If I could meet anyone alive, it would be her. (If she isn't available, I will accept President Obama as runner-up.) Why? Let's review...
  • For starters, she pwned cancer. As I'm sure you're aware, cancer is kind of a big deal, and she kicked it in the balls. Admittedly, the cancer did get in a pretty good sucker punch to the throat, but to (very, VERY loosely) paraphrase Our Lady of the Iron Will, “Suck it, Cancer! I will sing whether you like it or not because you're jealous and I'm awesome.” Yeah. Pretty sure she said something like that...
  • She can do anything! No really. I think she and Stephen Hawking should take over the world. With their powers combined, they might even be able to resuscitate Captain Planet! Which clearly we could use right about now.
  • Anybody ever seen The Sound of Music? Of course you have. Me too. Grew up with it, I did... (My mom used to turn it off after the wedding scene. I didn't even know there were Nazis in that movie until middle school. Love you, Mom <3 ) How about Victor/Victoria? The only other fantastically androgynous performance that comes close is Tilda Swinton in Constantine (a movie that I will only halfway admit to having seen). And then of course there's the ever-adorable Princess Diaries. Anyway, what point am I trying to make...? I guess that Julie Andrews puts the “be” in believable. She can do anything because she can be anyone, and don't you forget it!
  • This probably never happened, but I like to imagine that at some point she said, “Oh hello, I couldn't help but notice some wrinkles and grey hairs and the kinds of things that give the pretty girls insomnia the night before their 30th birthday. Well you know what? I'M GOING TO STAY PRETTY FOREVER.” I mean seriously, have you seen that woman? I can only hope I look that sexy at 76.
  • Did I mention she's a dame? I know life isn't supposed to have a scorecard, but getting to put “dame” before your name sure seems like winning to me.
  • So I've never actually met her (obviously, because if I had she would have totally loved me and we'd be superbestfriends by now), but I like to think I'm pretty good at reading the Universe, and when I think “Julie Andrews,” this is what comes to mind... A warm heart, dazzling smile and fantastic humour. I imagine she's quick-witted, confident, wise, compassionate. I bet when no one is looking she's full of secret mischief. And then there's that sparkle in her eyes that simply says “I'm alive!”
I have nothing more to say.

That's a lie. I always have more to say. But I am declaring this the
end of post.

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